The Victim:
"I have a first date tonight and I'm really nervous. Any tips to make a good impression?"
My Genius Advice:
"Bring a megaphone. Don't speak unless it's through the megaphone. It shows you have a strong presence and are prepared for emergency situations."
The Victim's Regret:
"They asked me to leave the restaurant before we even ordered appetizers. I think the megaphone feedback loop broke a window."